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Susan Bonifant writes in The Washington Post’s ON PARENTING about the following revelation regarding her involvement in her 21 year old daughter’s life:

“Now my “helpful” actions were not a comfort but a log to move out of the road.”

I’ve always joked that if I were to write a book of advice for parents of adult children (and I’m trying to!), it would be a very very short book.

One page. One question/answer: “If, as a parent you’re asking yourself “Should I butt in or butt out?” of an issue your adult child is having, the answer is almost always “Butt out.”

Ms. Bonifant offers a similar suggestion from a psychology teacher who specialized in child development:

“Never miss an opportunity to shut up.”

Here’s the whole article. Read it, think about it and figure out how to be your adult child’s “neighbor.”

WANT TO KEEP YOUR GROWN KIDS IN YOUR LIFE? LEARN TO BE THE IMPARTIAL NEIGHBOR

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/parenting/wp/2016/09/22/want-to-keep-your-grown-kids-in-your-life-be-the-impartial-neighbor/